No One Cares

“Nobody made you do this, so you can’t feel sorry for yourself.” Harsh but important words from 16 year small business owner and older brother of mine, Collin. Seldom one to mince words, Col is gifted with a level of directness, cultivated throughout his career, I find envious. 

It is extremely easy to think that because you started something, you’ve earned or are owed something. Attention, customers, investment, sales, suppliers who care, people to like your posts, admiration – all the above. Reality is, you’re not cool or important because you started something. I know because I have expected, consciously or unconsciously, all of these at one time or another during this 4 year journey of mine with Favor.

So, a while ago, I adopted the ‘no one cares’ motto, as a reminder. Harsh at face value, sure – but it helps me hammer home an important idea – you have to earn it. People are busy and have their own lives/problems to worry about and just because the thing you're doing is hard doesn't mean other people have to care more about it. You have to make a good product, provide value and until you prove to them why they should care, you're not entitled to that. You aren’t owed anything, and the sooner you realize that, the easier it will be.

It also helps manage your expectations. Expecting something in return for taking a personal risk is simply not helpful. Like holding grudges – it’s mostly just affecting you – so best to just let that shit go and focus.

Starting a business is like anything — you don’t know how or what it’s going to be until you do it. You don’t know how hard, accepted, lonely, uncertain, stressful, rewarding, exciting etc. It’s just impossible to know until you do it, like dunking the basketball (flex). I have put in more effort creating Favor than I had in my previous jobs combined (incalculable, but true), and have struggled infinitely more. That’s the game. Unless you catch a big early break or have something revolutionary, you need to cut your teeth and earn the shit. 

When you’re a good person who's built social equity in life and you start something new, most people are going to be excited and interested at the start. What I have found however is that there are some people who truly care and follow the journey along the way, and it’s really important to show appreciation for that.

And it’s also important to not take it personally when others who don’t show the level of interest you thought they might  – or who say they want to invest and then don’t, or say they want to help in another capacity and don’t follow through – this is not for everyone and that's ok. I would recommend you just focus on the vision and try your best to get right the people right around you.

In closing, taking things personally only takes away from what you're trying to. Appreciate the love you receive and keep it moving.